wisdom Archives %- – Rock The Wrinkle

They say with age, comes wisdom. I believe that’s’ true. But at times, I want to know exactly what kind of wisdom is it that I’m getting more of each year.

Surely it’s more than realizing I can’t remember what I just wrote down on that slip of paper anymore, much less find the paper. Or that jumping off any surface higher than 6 inches is really not a good idea.

Is it wisdom about not being concerned about what everyone thinks about everything I do? That’s a good thing. Or wisdom that tells me what is really important in life, and what is really not? That helps with not wasting my time on superfluous stuff.

But what about the idea that as you grow wiser, you are expected to be kinder, more forgiving, more championing of the successes of others in your boomer & beyond community…even when it really is hard to do?

Stand by and cheer them on. Be glad for their success. Smile and clap at the right moments. It all sounds so Wayne Dyer-esque. It’s good for us. We know this.

But….

When you hear of someone who just suddenly, basically on a whim, accomplishes something you’ve worked your whole life to do, it’s hard. Even if what this person has done isn’t on the scale that you deem acceptable or have set out to do. They took the “easy” road.

You’re still trying to choose the right entrance ramp.

It’s one thing to be glad for them. It’s another to listen to all the accolades others bestow upon this person and not feel your blood boil.

Oh my. Not sounding much like Mother Teresa, are we?

I don’t like having these feelings. I tell myself I’m not jealous, because I don’t think I am. I guess it’s just that feeling of wanting my efforts recognized somehow, or maybe it’s that after a lifetime of working towards something, I don’t want to look up and see that some other person got there first because they bought the app.

Of course it shouldn’t matter. Even Jesus told a parable about the workers in the fields. So it’s clearly none of my business. And maybe I need to wise up and take a few shortcuts myself.

But I can’t bring myself to do that. There’s just certain areas of life I hold sacred, and while I expect younger generations (cue the sound of dentures falling out) to take the shorter route to everything (they deserve the find their own and better way)…I get upset when fellow boomers and beyond do it.

Go figure. I still expect us all to play fair and be nice to one another. Which of course means I need to do that as well. Without worrying that someone else just figured out how to get there first.

I’m working on it.

“Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.”

Albert Schweitzer

Seriously. Let’s be honest. Shall we?

Or, as boomers, can we?

I read an article the other day that said baby boomers are not very honest. It claimed we don’t tell the truth about ourselves on online dating sites, or post current photos. We supposedly tell our children and grandchildren, “do as I say, not as I did.”

We don’t volunteer the truth about our age. Our weight. Our marital status.

We fudge on our taxes and fib to our bosses.

And then, the article went on to say, we growl at the younger generations and claim THEY are the ones who don’t act responsibly.

Is there really such a divide? After all the years we spent saying not to trust anyone over 30, are we now the ones who can’t tell fact from fiction?

I sometimes wonder what happened to the concept of truth. Cable news survives on reporting false information…hey it was on television, so it must be true. Sports figures use drugs and then can’t recall doing it until they get caught. Authors steal work from others. Executives make up résumés.

Politicians…don’t get me started.

These are people of all ages. Yet I admit I’m probably more disappointed in a public figure over 55 who gets caught lying, cheating, or scamming. Surely we’ve grown up enough to get past the need to distort things. Life is hard enough, why make it even harder by coming up with a fake story you have to remember?

Then there’s the little white lies that maybe aren’t so bad for us. Like not wanting to acknowledge aging or limitations. Not grinning with joy when the kid bagging the groceries says ma’am or sir. Not being content to fade into the background because society says it’s through with us.

Talk to a member of the Generation X (born between 1965 and 1980) and they might give you an earful about us boomers. Like how we are taking their jobs because we won’t gracefully retire. How instead of saving money for retirement, we’re out dancing, taking cruises, and learning to zip line…thus leaving little or no inheritance. We’re ruining the planet. Too greedy. Too self-centered. We won’t admit we’re older.

Interesting perspective. Yet I’m not sure what we are supposed to do…it would be great if America valued age, wisdom, elders. If people with gray and white hair were sought out for their counsel and opinions and younger people really respected those who have gone before. Unfortunately, I don’t think we are there.

So maybe we’re really teaching the next generations how to keep on living…how to stay viable and healthy and engaged long past the standard expiration date.

What do you think? Are we being honest with ourselves about who we are? Are we denying our age and robbing someone else of an experience? Or are we paving the way for a new attitude about growing older?

I know this: I am a boomer. I feel about 36 inside. And I’m not ready to fade away just yet.